I've Got Jungle Fever (And Not the Good Kind)
I am a hypochondriac. Name a disease or chronic ailment and I've most likely already had it. Once I know the symptoms, self-diagnosis is mere moments away. For several hours yesterday I was clearly suffering from an acute case of Australian Spotted Fever. This morning, I spent breakfast with Diphtheria (which, I probably don't have to tell you, makes it very difficult to enjoy an otherwise delightful bowl of cereal). Needless to say, I tend to blow things out of proportion. Which is why I'm trying not to worry too much that, at present, I am exhibiting numerous signs of either Gingivitis or Hepatitis A thru E. On the bright side, my fear of testiculitis was completely unfounded. Guess I dodged a bullet on that one. Whew...
posted by jenn marsala at 12:40 PM
6 Comments:
I'm schizophrenic, and so am I.
I guess I'm sort of a hypochondriac too, I have a list of Phobias, I've listed the phobias I have.
1 Arachibutyrophobia I fear peanut butter sticking to the roof of my mouth.
2 Aulophobia, Fear of flutes.
3 Auroraphobia, Fear of the northern lights, those DAM lights.
4 Bolshephobia, Fear of Bolsheviks
5 Coprastasophobia, Fear of constipation
6 Coulrophobia, Fear of clowns
7 Dutchphobia, Fear of the Dutch
8 Proctophobia, Fear of rectums.
9 Mayophobia, Fear of Mayoanise
10 Russophobia, Fear of Russians
11 Sinophobia, Fear of Chineese
12 Triskaidekaphobia, Fear of the number 13
14 And the one I hate the most. Phobophobia, Fear of Phobias.
I know exactly what you mean. This one time, I felt really, really warm, and there was a bad fever going around at the time. So I checked the internet for other symptoms that I may have, just to make sure, and it seemed like I had every single one of them.
It later turned out that my building was on fire, which explained the sensation of warmth and every other one of the symptoms, except heightened sensitivity in the nipples. I'm still not sure what caused that.
This seems like a fantastically funny and enjoyable blog, and I look forward to reading much more from you.
Much love,
Fromstein
I have spent the past little while continuing to read as much as my eyes can take in without bleeding from your blog, and I have loved all but a single word of it (on June 6th, I feel very strongly that the sentence "Love you even." needs a comma in between "you" and even". But I'll let it slide).
I would be cheating the few readers of my blog if I didn't post a link to your blog on my blog, for the purposes of all-around general blogging.
Lastly, from what I've read, it sounds like you're an Ellen DeGeneres fan. Am I right? Well, am I? That's ok, you can get back to me later. I didn't really expect an answer so soon anyway.
Much love,
Fromstein
i think i worry too much at times.
can you diagnose that, jenn??
Phew is right! glad you are okay : )
I actually got jungle fever, which wasn't so cool. I am going to Ecuador this summer, and I had to get a shot for all these crazy jungle diseases like yellow fever. Catch is, they haven't completely removed the human component, so I had to stay at the clinic in case I suddenly developed the disease. I was ok, but technically speaking, I got jungle fever :-).
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